No Kids, No Life, Just a Wife

Angry? Yeah, so you know what? FUCK YEAH I was an angry teen. Who wasn't? I hated Every. Fucking. Thing. I wasn't popular (yeah, shut up!) , I was "prego's" more times than I can account for (considering I didn't have sex in HS), and Oh my God please could the boys like me even just a little?? In the sexy way?? Not just the way that I will play intramural soccer with them???? Please? I wasn't a nerd, I wasn't popular, I was nothing, a floater, except I wasn't invited to parties, cuz I wasn't allowed to go anyway. I grew up with rules. God forbid! AND I was afraid of the consequences. Truly afraid. Would you like to know who I was afraid of? Yeah, no, don't guess. Not my dad. Mother. I thought my Mother was the meanest, cruelest, psycho bitch in the universe. Why did I think she was crazy? Because I wasn't allowed to run Willy-Nilly. I soooooooooooooooooooooooo wanted to be one of the cool kids, but that required parents who didn't give a Fuck. At all. Evah. Yeah, My teen years were rough, for me and mom. I am the Oldest. I think that grants me certain rights for being the cause of gray hair and screaming. I wasn't a good kid. I tried to be, I always thought I was doing the right thing, well almost anyway. (Shut up assholes who know me, don't ruin my story! I can think I was a golden child if I want!) I was friends with criminals, they were small time dammit, and I thought in my teen angsty, dorky, lifetime movie/WE TV kinda way they were just acting out. They just wanted to be loved. To know there were people who cared. And I thought I could fix it. Mom, of course, knew better. And I didn't like it. At All. Ever. Yeah, I spent most of my time grounded. Cuz I was good like that.
I managed to graduate High School, without getting pregnant, and went to college. yeah, I totally managed to fuck that up too. All I got out of college was an M.R.S. degree. Because I suck. And I was to lazy (and hung the-fuck-over/stoned) to actually attend class. Finally, I decided wasting mom's money wasn't getting me anywhere and quit. And I moved home. And mom supported me. And loved me. And even in my pre-teen/college drop out/dumb ass way I could still piss that woman off. But ya know what? I LOVE my mom. We are best friends now. I love the fact that she put rules and regulations in my life and didn't just let me run rampant and do something stupid and ruin my life. And while I say with all certainty, I can't live in the same house as her and I know damn well she can't live in the same house with me, I love my mom.




p.s. Yeah, and fuck off, my sisters WERE perfect. So shut up. I think I was the test baby.