YAY! Post number 100!

Now for the apologies! I am a big jerk. I know! I have brought you no Funny, and hardly any good stories. I spent all (Most? Some?) of November packing and being generally unsuitable for conversation due to said packing. Plus I had Thanksgiving with the Crazy almost Irish mob side of His family. Yes, I made sure to put HIS because I have enough crazy, he can keep his. We, and when I say we, I mean I and a random assortment of his friends moved my entire house on Black Friday. It Rocked heartily. (LIES!!! ALL LIES! MOVING BLOWS!) but at least we have friends who will help us move. That is kinda cool. So anyway, I spent the rest of the weekend cleaning, painting and picking up general clutter and bits that are always left behind. naturally, that is the weekend we got the first and second big frost so all the leaves fell out of all 6 trees simultaneously. THAT, my friends, Is awesome! Especially since The Capt threw my rake away. (No, I will not go buy another rake. He must go and get me a new rake. It's his fault I don't have one.) {Shut up. I know I'll end up buying my own fucking rake. Let me have my fantasy bitches!} Wait, where was I?? OH! So I was using my FIL's cheap ass, weak as shit leaf blower and fell down a hill. And I don't mean like "Oops! Haha, I fell down" I mean like 'Movie Fall'. I trip in Slow motion.... windmilling my arms so this cheap ass leaf blower goes flying over my head as I smash into stumps, roots, rocks and shit. Of course my back pockets are full of things. Pokey Thing. A Utility Knife, 2 paint can openers, my cell phone.... you know. Shit. So, it's Sunday after I've just spent the entire weekend moving, painting, cleaning, I am physically and mentally wiped out and now I just threw myself down a fucking embankment and hurt myself. What do I do? Well, the only logical thing. I pull the leaf blower over, and sob hysterically. I was sore, tired, angry, and now I was bruised on top of everything so I just broke down. I eventually finished the leaves between sniffles. And when I stopped at the bank to deposit a check on my way to my new home I think I was still crying a little and the girl behind the glass might have been a little afraid of me, but thats ok. I lived, and the pretty bruises on my heiny did go away. Just wait for tomorrow. I'll tell you all about the attack of the really old beer can. It also is tremendous fun!

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